• Conan OBrien: I’d love to have @HillaryClinton as a guest on the show, but I can’t afford her speaking fee.

    15 hours ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: In Pennsylvania, an 80-year-old widow found a 40-something year old man living in her house. She waited 2 years then called the cops.

    yesterday from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: Saw Mad Max: Fury Road. Not a lot of Priuses in that movie.

    2 days ago from Twitter for Android

  • Conan OBrien: A new study claims coffee fights erectile dysfunction. That explains Starbucks’ new slogan, “Who wants a grande?

    3 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: An earthquake hit Las Vegas. 1,200 Elvises were all shook up.

    4 days ago from Twitter for Android

  • Conan OBrien: College grads: If you’re looking for work, consider the fast-growing field of “Republican presidential candidate.”

    5 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: LA will raise its minimum wage to $15 p/h by 2020. Angelenos making minimum wage said they can’t wait to be able to buy things in 5 years.

    6 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: It's absolutely absurd to thank David Letterman for all he's done in a tweet. But that's the world we live in now. #ThanksDave

    7 days ago from Twitter for Android

  • Conan OBrien: My wife and I have an understanding. When a gorgeous model comes on the show, my wife understands I'll do nothing.

    7 days ago from Hootsuite

  • Conan OBrien: When I'm on my death bed, my last words will be, "Who the hell put me on this death bed?"

    8 days ago from Hootsuite

  • Conan OBrien: .@ThirdManRecords is offering new LP photo sleeves. @RollingStone called mine "The Greatest Album Ever Made": http://t.co/n9c02S1YeS

    9 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: You can wear tennis shoes anywhere, but golf shoes are only good for golf and rough sex.

    9 days ago from Hootsuite

  • Conan OBrien: Still trying to find a problem that cheese can’t fix.

    10 days ago from Hootsuite

  • Conan OBrien: Today is a success. I did NOT click on a Buzzfeed link entitled “17 Ways Your Talkshow is Giving You Cancer.”

    11 days ago from Hootsuite

  • Conan OBrien: C’mon, Republicans, two more presidential candidates and we’ll have an even 100.

    12 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: In New York, having a Guinness at this terrific bar on 2nd Avenue. Just thought you'd want to know. http://t.co/zK0MWbY5v3

    13 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: I don’t care what anyone says, I’m still sleeping in my Tom Brady pajamas.

    13 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: My daughter tricked me into getting her an Apple watch by threatening to get a wrist tattoo.

    14 days ago from Hootsuite

  • Conan OBrien: Look for me in the credits of the new Entourage movie. I was “Lead Fedora Wrangler.”

    15 days ago from Hootsuite

  • Conan OBrien: Carly Fiorina has a great strategy to win the nomination. She’s going to lay off the other candidates.

    16 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: Is the link to the new Magic Mike trailer a good Mother’s Day gift?

    18 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: I don't normally do #FF, but my Associate Producer/Office Creep @JordanSchlansky just joined Twitter. Follow him if you hate life.

    19 days ago from Twitter for iPhone

  • Conan OBrien: I played #Witcher3 on #CONAN and battled my greatest nemesis: Sexual frustration. http://t.co/LQIw3BZ2xw #CluelessGamer

    19 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: Last night on #CONAN, I played #Witcher3 and battled my greatest nemesis: Sexual frustration. http://t.co/W8ffmYc5DP #CluelessGamer

    19 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: Dr. Ben Carson was the first surgeon to successfully separate conjoined twins joined at the head. The Koch brothers are forever thankful.

    20 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: I’m sad that young people will never experience the magic of seeing pornography on the big screen.

    21 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: Happy #CincoDeMayo! It’s a holiday that’s as respectful of Mexican traditions as Epcot Center’s Mexican food pavilion.

    22 days ago from Twitter for Android

  • Conan OBrien: If it weren't for #StarWarsDay I don't think anyone would be talking about Star Wars on the internet today.

    23 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: With so much great television right now, there’s never been a better time to be bed-ridden.

    24 days ago from Twitter Web Client

  • Conan OBrien: Buying your kid a goldfish is a great way to teach them about responsibility for 24-36 hours.

    25 days ago from Twitter Web Client

Recent news headlines:

Conan OBrien on Twitter

Hails from: Los Angeles
Bio: The voice of the people. Sorry, people.
Best known for: NBC cast-off
Following: 1
Followers: 16,622,746
Twitter ID: ConanOBrien
Career tweets: 2,062
Tweeting online since: February 18, 2010
In category: Other

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